Acceptance

I'm going to be 35 this year. Which means my eggs are 35 too. Pregnancy is still possible but fertility drops off after this. I have family members who couldn't have kids, some adopted. Still others just didn't have them (well one is a priest)  because they didn't want them or held out and married later. It was always in the back of my mind that I may never have any as it doesn't just happen automatically. I understood not everyone that gives birth wants to or can care for their children so they are doing their best by giving them a chance with another family. I reproduced when I was 21. She wasn't planned -I don't regret this. Left to my own devices I would have overthought it. She has a half sister in Germany whom she has never met. I split up with her father. We were speaking then his number wasn't in service anymore. I think he procrastinated and now doesn't know how to get back to us. I'm not angry at him more disappointed that I couldn't manage to make it easier for the two of them to stay in contact. I have somebody else in my life now but children never happened. She's it. I'm a bit sad about in one sense as he would love a mini version of him but on the other hand he loves my girl.